Taking Care Of Your Grandchildren

When you take care of your grandkids — whether it's for a few hours or a few days — you're probably anxious to put all of your great parenting experience to good use.
But you may want to brush up on a few child care basics. Though you raised healthy kids in a safe environment, in recent years much research has been devoted to child safety. Government agencies and medical experts have developed a slew of safety standards and laws to keep kids healthy and out of harm's way. And as a result, many new products are available that make it convenient and economical for parents — and grandparents — to meet those new standards.
Whether you're caring for grandkids at their house or in your home, these tips can make the experience enjoyable — and trauma-free — for all of you!

Hand Washing

Thorough hand washing — particularly after going to the bathroom and before preparing or eating food — is now recognized as one of the most important ways to prevent the spread of any illness, from the flu to infectious diarrhea.

To really get rid of germs: wet your hands with warm water, then rub with soap for at least 15 seconds (long enough to sing a few rounds of "Happy Birthday") before rinsing well. In a public restroom, dry your hands on a disposable towel, then use that towel to turn off the faucet.

Teach your grandkids this important habit to help the entire family stay healthy. If you have a tough time getting them to make a stop at the sink, try soaps with bright colors, fun shapes, or appealing smells. Or have them sing a favorite song during the scrubbing.

Medications

Know what medications you can give your grandchild in the event of illness. If you have any questions, call the child's doctor before giving any over-the-counter medications.

Also, kids who are 12 years old or younger should never be given aspirin, as it has been linked to Reye syndrome, a serious illness that can cause nausea, vomiting, and behavioral changes, and often requires treatment in a hospital. Also, never give a child medications that have been prescribed to someone else, whether it's an adult or child. Even if two people have the same illness, they may require different drugs with different doses and directions.

 

Sleep

Infants younger than 1 year old should be placed on their backs to sleep to reduce the risk of sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS). Infants should not be placed on their stomachs or their sides to sleep. Babies should sleep in a crib or bassinet on a firm mattress, without soft bedding, plush toys, or other soft objects. Loose bedding, such as blankets and sheets, should be tucked under the crib mattress to avoid covering the infant's face.

Other ways to lower the risk of SIDS include:

• Keep room temperature comfortable and avoid over-bundling.
• Give the infant a pacifier at naptime and bedtime, but do not force it if the baby refuses it.
• Do not replace a pacifier that has fallen out during sleep.
• Do not expose the infant to cigarette smoke.

In addition, infants who sleep in the same room (though not the same bed) as their mothers have a lower risk of SIDS. Consider having a crib or bassinet in the room where you or the child's parents sleep.

TV, Computers, and Video Games

Kids under 2 years old should not have any time in front of a screen, including TVs, DVDs or videos, and computers. After age 2, kids should have no more than 1 to 2 hours of quality programming a day.

Offer your grandkids a variety of free-time activities to try instead of TV or videos, video games, and the Internet. The TV should be turned off during meals and homework, and you can set a good example by limiting your own TV watching.

To help you decide what programs are appropriate for your grandchild, look for age-group rating tools on some TV programs and video games (they're usually listed onscreen).

Vaccines

Immunizations are one of the most important ways to keep kids — and everyone around them — healthy. Find out if your grandchildren are up-to-date on all their immunizations.

Also, it's particularly important for grandparents to get annual flu shots, which are recommended for everyone over 6 months of age, including adults. Flu shots usually are given between September and mid-November and throughout flu season. Also make sure that you have had the Tdap vaccine. This is particularly important to help decrease the chance of spreading pertussis (whooping cough) to your grandchild. Pertussis can cause very serious illness or death in infants.

Car Seats

Babies and children should be in child safety seats that meet current standards. All kids younger than 12 years should ride in the back seat with the appropriate safety restraint.

The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) recommends that infants and toddlers ride in a rear-facing seat until they are 2 years old or until they have reached the maximum weight and height limits recommended by the manufacturer.

All kids 2 years or older, or those younger than 2 years who have outgrown the rear-facing height or weight limit for their car seat, should use a forward-facing car seat with a full harness for as long as possible.

Booster seats are vehicle safety seats for kids who have outgrown forward-facing or convertible car seats but are still too small to be properly restrained by a vehicle's seatbelts.

Many states have laws requiring booster seats for kids up to 8 years old and 80 pounds, or 4 feet 9 inches tall. The AAP states that kids should use a booster seat until the car's lap-and-shoulder belt fits properly, which is typically when they've reached 4 feet 9 inches in height and are between 8 and 12 years old.

All 50 states and the District of Columbia have safety seat laws and more than half have booster seat laws. Ask your local government office or department of motor vehicles about child safety restraint laws in your state.

Even if your state does not require booster seats for older children, put safety first when traveling with your grandkids. Follow manufacturer recommendations and instructions and do not exceed weight limits.

Cribs

Use a firm crib mattress. To avoid suffocation hazards, keep soft objects and loose bedding out of the crib, including pillows, quilts, comforters, sheepskins, stuffed toys, etc.

Cribs manufactured after 1974 meet current safety standards, including slats that are no more than 2-3/8 inches apart so that infants can't get their heads stuck. A crib that has been in the family for generations may not be suitable or safe — cribs made before 1974 may be covered in lead paint, have slats that are too far apart, or pose other safety hazards.

Before using a crib, check the side rails for locking devices. Remove mobiles when an infant is 5 months old or can get on his or her hands and knees.

 

Toys

Guidelines published by the U.S. Consumer Products Safety Commission (CPSC) can help you determine which toys are age-appropriate for your grandkids. You may think that because a grandchild seems mature, he or she can handle a toy that was meant for an older child. But that's not a good idea, as age guidelines for toys are determined by developmental appropriateness as well as safety.

When you shop, look for sturdy, well-made toys that don't pose choking hazards. Cribs, toys, and equipment you might have used with your kids may have sentimental value, but often aren't safe options now.

Walkers

Doctors strongly discourage the use of walkers (devices with wheeled frames and suspended seats that allow babies to propel themselves forward using their feet). Infant walkers don't let infants walk any sooner than they would without one and they pose a high risk of injury, particularly from falls down stairs that may result in serious head injuries.

Infant walkers also allow access to hazards normally out of reach and they don't give babies the necessary pulling up, creeping, or crawling experiences that are the foundation for later movement. Stationary walkers are a safer alternative, but limit the amount of time spent in them.

Helmets

Helmets save lives and prevent serious head injuries so make sure that your grandkids always wear one when riding a tricycle or bicycle.

Many states and local municipalities have laws that require kids to wear helmets every time they ride their bikes. Fortunately, helmets are now being made in colors and styles that appeal to kids, so they're not as much of a hard sell as they once were.

Make sure that your grandchild's helmet fits well. Be a positive role model (and protect your own head) by wearing your helmet, too.

Helmets should also be used for skating sports such as skateboarding, rollerskating, and inline skating. The AAP recommends that kids always wear helmets and wrist, elbow, and knee padding for those sports.

Strangulation Hazards

Babies and toddlers can strangle or become entrapped in the most unexpected ways — curtain cords, strings on clothing, and infant furniture and accessories can be dangerous.

Reduce the risk of strangulation by not putting necklaces or headbands on your grandkids and not dressing them in clothes with drawstrings, which can get caught on play equipment and furniture. And while it may be handy, don't tie a pacifier around your grandchild's neck or tether it clothing.

Tie up all window blind and drapery cords so that they aren't within kids' reach, and avoid having telephone cords that dangle to the floor. While mobiles that dangle above the crib can offer babies great visual stimulation, they should be removed by 5 months of age or once your grandchild can get on his or her hands and knees.

Be sure to install safety gates but don't use old accordion-style ones, which can trap a child's head.

Choking Hazards

Putting things in their mouths is one of the ways that babies and youngsters explore their worlds. But certain foods, toys, and other small objects that we probably take for granted can easily lodge in a their little airways.

Common choking hazards for kids under 4 years old include foods like peanuts, popcorn, raw carrots and other raw vegetables, hard fruits, whole grapes or cherries, or hard candies. Watch out for small plastic toys that come from vending machines or parts of older siblings' toys, such as (Barbie) doll shoes or small construction pieces (like Leggos).

Be especially vigilant during adult parties, when nuts and other foods might be easily accessible to small hands. Clean up promptly and carefully, and check the floor for dropped foods that can cause choking. Make sure small refrigerator magnets and other small items are out of kids' reach.

Childproofing the House

Supervision is always the best way to keep grandkids safe. But it's also wise to childproof your home.

Walk through your house with an eye for anything that may be unsafe for kids, including tools, knives, and choking hazards. For babies and toddlers, put outlet covers on all of the outlet plates. And don't forget safety latches and locks for cabinets and drawers in the kitchen and bathroom. Look for products that adults can easily install and use, but which are sturdy enough to withstand pulls and tugs from children.

Safety latches and child-resistant packaging are not guarantees of protection, so be sure to keep medicines, household cleaners, and other dangerous substances locked away and out of reach. Consider doorknob covers and door locks to help keep kids away from places with hazards, like bathrooms and swimming pools.

Child safety products are typically sold at drugstores, big-box stores, and hardware stores.

Lead Exposure

It's important to do what you can to reduce kids' exposure to sources of lead, particularly if they're younger than 3 years old.

Lead, which is in paint, soil, and other household areas, has been linked to physical and behavioral problems. Though the government banned lead-based paint and gasoline in the 1970s, many older homes, toys, cribs, and even some furniture are covered in lead-based paint because they were painted before the ban.

If you live in an older house, chances are that lead-based paint was used at some time. To minimize exposure to lead-based paint chips, use a wet cloth to wipe windowsills and walls, and watch for water damage that can make the paint peel. And limit your grandchild's exposure if you have major renovations done.

Be sure that your grandkids wash their hands before eating, after playing outside, and at bedtime. Your doctor or local health department can provide more tips.

Older Furniture

When grandkids comes over to stay with you, don't use old cribs or baby furniture that your own kids might have used many years ago. Though these items may have served your kids just fine and have undeniable nostalgic appeal, they may not meet current safety standards, might be covered in lead paint, and may be worn down. Equipment needs to be in good condition and up to current safety standards.

Internet Safety

The Internet can be a great resource, and your grandkids may astound you with their ability to navigate a computer keyboard or an Internet search engine. As technology has improved, it's become an integral part of school and kids' lives. But it's important to reduce risks that kids might be exposed to online.

Online tools can restrict access to adult material and protect your grandchild from Internet predators. Many Internet service providers (ISPs) provide parent-control options to block certain material from coming into a computer. Software also can help block access to certain sites based on a "bad site" list that your ISP creates. Filtering programs can block sites from coming in and restrict your grandchild's personal information from being sent online.

Also, it's wise to create a screen name that protects a child's real identity. And consider adding house rules for computer use, such as: never give your name or address on the computer and never click on pop-up ads or offers to buy things.

Emergency Information

Be prepared in case you need to take your grandchild to the doctor or hospital. It's important to know a child's medical history, including any allergies and any medication your grandchild may be taking. Also have information about the child's insurance coverage and written permission from the parents authorizing you to seek medical care for the child.

Numbers to know:

• Poison Control: 1-800-222-1222. If you have a poisoning emergency, call for the poison control center in your area.
• Police/ambulance: If your grandchild has collapsed or is not breathing, call 911 or local emergency numbers.
• Phone number for your grandchild's doctor.
• Parents' work and cell phone numbers.

After raising healthy, safe kids now is the time to enjoy being a grandparent. Respecting your own child's role as a parent and taking safety precautions will make your visits — and your grandparenting experience — a whole lot smoother.

Resources:

  Kids Health (2012).Taking Care Of Your Grandchildren. Retrieved from the Kids Health website:  http://kidshealth.org/parent/positive/family/grandkids.html#

How To Support Teenage Parents

In case you have a teen pregnancy in your family it will definitely come as a shock, No one thinks of their teen as a parent at an age when they should be having fun and not bogged down with the responsibilities of a child. It is also normal for you as a parent of a teen who is expecting to be angry, shocked and hurt. There is frankly no point in recriminations and threats. With the deed done, if your teen has decided to have the baby then you have to be a support. The thought that she has come to you for help and support should make you want to go all out for your child.
It is very important for your teen to understand what goes into being a parent to a baby. All the support roles can be played by you, the parents, but the reality is that the onus of the baby is on the mother. Even if your son is going to be a teenage father don't let him shirk responsibilities. He has to know that he is responsible and will have to be actively involved emotionally and financially in whatever way possible.
Make him understand the role a good father plays in a child's life and hopefully your own family values would have taught him a lot. If it is your daughter then you can help with the finances and babysitting while your daughter completes her high school diploma. It is imperative that your support ensures that your child understands that a baby is no reason to leave school. With a high school diploma and even higher qualifications your teen has a chance of a better job that will help in providing for the baby in the future.
Living arrangements will have to be adjusted so that the coming baby will have some space. While you can be a support factor in the upbringing of the baby never let your daughter feel that the entire responsibility can be handed over to you. Making a decision to keep the baby means that certain lifestyle changes for your teen are inevitable.
Your teen will have to deal will comments at school, in the family and even in society, be there for her. Don't blame yourself or her. It was unfortunate but it happened and the baby is not to blame at all. Take her to support groups where teen pregnancies are discussed. Even if your child decides to abort or give up the child for adoption talk her through everything and be there for her. This is a difficult time for her too and knowing that your love is steadfast will see all of you through this time.
Thank you for reading my article - Please check out my other articles.

 Resource

 Ashley, J. (2013). How To Support Teenage Parents. Retrieved on Feb. 21, 2013 from the ezinearticles website: http://ezinearticles.com/?How-to-Support-Teenage-Parents&id=6918270

The Problems of a Child-Mother

Teen pregnancy is one of the major social issues in today's society. Today's teens are becoming sexually active at a younger age than teens of the previous generation. Most of the times, it is due to peer pressure to be "cool" and "popular". However, sadly, they are not aware of the consequences of unprotected sex, which leads to unwanted pregnancy. The pressures are manifold in such cases, first informing the parent about the situation they are in. Secondly, the guilt and shame such girls undergo can psychologically scar them for life.
Social Problems of Pregnant Teens
No matter how progressive a society is, unwed teen pregnancy is regarded negatively. If the mother happens to be a teenager, the problems become more acute. Education of the mother suffers the most as she drops out of school. Even if she continues her studies, the burden of looking after a child takes toll on her academic career. Lack of education hinders her progress in life and more often than not, such mothers turn towards crime. Poverty becomes a way of life and most of the time such mothers become victims of domestic violence, sexual and drug abuse and repeat pregnancy before they turn 20. The child in turn suffers neglect and even abandonment.
Health Problems of Teenage Pregnancy
Along with social problems, such young mothers face a host of health problems. The body of a woman is not ready physically or psychologically to bear a child at such a tender age. The teen faces problems whether she terminates the pregnancy or continues it. If she decides to terminate, there can be problems in conception later. Repeated abortion can lead to a severe gynecological problem. If she decides to continue with the pregnancy, the health of the unborn child can be in danger due to the improper eating habits of the mother. If she has a history of addiction, the child is in more danger. Underweight babies or babies with birth defects are a common result of teen pregnancy.
After birth, the mental state of the mother undergoes lots of stress due to emotional, social and hormonal reasons. Some mothers tend to reject their babies and take poor care of them as they view the child as unwanted. Some rejoice in their motherhood but their inexperience and age act as hindrance to their motherhood. If the mother decides to give up the child for adoption, a sense of guilt develops which can harm her future mental health.
Present Social Scenario
With the spread of sex education and increased use of contraception, recent studies have shown that there is a steady decrease in teenage pregnancy in the US. The numbers of young mothers in 1991 was 60 among 1000 that had reduced to 51 in 1998. Still, according to Women's Health Channel, there are about 1 million pregnant teens in the US every year. Beside, facing the above-mentioned emotional, social and medical problems, such mothers further put themselves in danger by not seeking proper medical assistance.
What then is the solution? Proper sex education, guidance and counseling regarding teen pregnancy and its consequences, family support and helping hand from the society are some of the solutions. All these can lead to decrease in the problem of teen pregnancy.
Pregnancy and pregnancy period are sources of joy and jubilation. However, teen pregnancy causes concern due to social and health issues related to teenage pregnancy in comparison with other pregnancy types. Visit Pregnancy-Period.Com which offers information about all aspects of pregnancy including teen pregnancy.

Resource:

 Jain, Anupiya. (2007) The-Problems-Of-A-Child-Mother. Retrieved on Feb. 21, 2013 from the ezinearticles website: http://ezinearticles.com/?Teen-Pregnancy---The-Problems-Of-A-Child-Mother&id=550584

How to teach teens to care for a baby.

Many teens need help learning to take care of a baby. Some teens want to become parents because they think of how fun it will be when they are in school or the fun to take the child to the park. Various teens do not realize how hard raising an infant is. It is very helpful that all teens male or females learn how to properly take care of a baby.
Otherwise, teens that end up pregnant will end up not taking care of their child properly. Babysitting is also a good way to make money and many people love a night out. Therefore, even if a teen only uses the skills they learn while taking care of a baby for a babysitting job, they will make money for things that they want or need.
Babysitting is a great way for a teen to learn to take care of a baby. This will give the teen hands on experience in changing diapers and feeding the child. This will also help the teen see how hard taking care of a child is. One great way to help teen to avoid teen pregnancy is allowing them to see how hard an infant is to take care of. The teen should become certified in first aid before attempting to baby-sit.
Always have a person on call if the teen runs into trouble. If needed, asking the parents of the baby to let the teen take care of the baby when they are home first is helpful. Most family members are willing to let the teen learn with them before they start babysitting. Taking care of younger siblings, cousins or nieces and nephews on a daily basis if the family needs can also help a teen gain experience.
Many YMCA’s will allow a teen to work in a nursery setting during a summer camp. This is an excellent way to learn to take care of a baby. Most people there are willing to teach the teen all the basics so that they can perform their job to the best to their ability. Teens are paid and learn how to change diapers, make bottles and even how to dress the child. This is a good job for a teen starting to look for work.
Churches also have nursery care on Sundays. Churches allow the teen if the teen has attended for a certain amount of time to help donate their Sundays helping with the infants. If the teen volunteers every Sunday, they will be able to create a close bond with a baby while learning the necessary life skills of care-taking an infant by themselves. People will be there to help if needed; otherwise, the teen is expected to learn by themselves.
Volunteering or interning at a daycare is another way to learn to take care of a baby. When a teen volunteers after becoming certified, they are able to lean how much work a baby takes. They will be able to put this on their job resume too. Learning how to play with a baby and how to make sure the baby stays safe during the day.
If a teen is a teen parent and struggling to raise their child, then there are many parenting classes at the local hospitals and support groups that will help the teen learn to take care of their baby. Parents can also teach their teen how to help with the baby. Some aunts and uncles are also very hands on in teaching a teen how to care for a baby in some cultures.

RESOURCE:

 
Angel, G., (2010) How to teach teens to care for a baby. Retrieved on Feb 21. 2013 from the Helium website: http://www.helium.com/items/1820937-Tweens-Pre-Teens

Teenage pregnancy: Advice for parents of teens.

If you're faced with a teenage pregnancy, it's tough to predict how you'll feel. You'll probably experience a mass of emotions: anger, disappointment, fear. All of these feelings are real and you can't decide that you just won't feel them. Instead, acknowledge your emotions and work with them. If you're angry, say so. If you're caught up in your emotions and don't think you can have a productive conversation right away, let your teen know that you need to put some distance between you and the news — then agree on a specific time to sit down and discuss the decisions that need to be made.

When you talk to your teen about the options, remember that any decisions about the pregnancy are your teen's to make — including whether to keep the baby, have an abortion or place the baby for adoption. Your decisions focus on how you'll support your teen and his or her decisions. If you have strong feelings against abortion, how will you handle a decision to end the pregnancy? If you feel that keeping the baby is the wisest choice, how actively will you participate in caring for or supporting the baby?

When you talk with your teen, discuss how the pregnancy will change your teen's life — as well as how it will change your family's life. Talk finances, talk responsibilities, talk school. Talk about everything. Listen to what your teen is saying and ask how he or she is feeling. Let your teen know that his or her feelings are important to you. Above all, love your teen no matter what. 

Resource:

 Murry, Mary (R.N./ C.N.M.) (2011) Teenage pregnancy: Advice for parents of teens. Mayoclinic website: http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/teenage-pregnancy/MY01865/rss=11

Teaching Teens How to Be Parents

 New parents who also happen to be teenagers face an array of challenges that set their parenting experiences apart. According to Kelly Land, Transitional Program Manager at the Redmond-based nonprofit Friends of Youth, "taking on familial responsibility means [that they are] missing out on some aspects of their teen years. While developmentally teens are still exploring their own identities, as parents they have to be available to their children."

Several Puget Sound organizations offer programs that teach teens about parenthood. Land's program, for example, focuses on teens who were homeless when they became pregnant. Moms from this population are often dealing with multiple issues in addition to parenting, including physical and emotional abuse, poverty, drug use and homelessness. "Sometimes that responsibility [of parenting] saves their lives," Land says.

Education is a key component of teens being able to develop parenting skills and gaining access to family-wage jobs, experts agree. Without a high school diploma or GED, teen parents are less likely to become self-supporting. A good education also means that teens are more likely to read parenting books and also to read with their children.

Barriers to finishing high school include child-care availability, access to transportation and school hours that begin before babies wake up. Feelings of not fitting in can also cause teens to drop out. In addition, teen parents don't always understand the positive impact that education will have on future earnings. "I carry articles with statistics about income differences to motivate my clients to stay in school," says Carla Granat, Teen Parent Counselor at Seattle-based Amara Parenting and Adoption.

A variety of programs focus on helping teen parents continue their education. Tacoma's Oakland High School is home to a suite of teen-parent support services, including an Early Head Start program, a teen-parenting class in school and on-site child care. Early Head Start serves low-income families with children from ages birth to 3 and strongly encourages parents to finish school.

Housing is another major issue. Most teen moms live with their parents or the parents of their children's fathers out of necessity, whether that environment is supportive or not. "They get in arguments with their parents and get kicked out," says Arnold of the Rainier Beach Family Support Center.

While the challenges are significant, Granat stresses that teen parenting is not all negative. "They have a certain level of energy that helps," she notes. "Not knowing all the ramifications of having a child also provides them some resiliency."

Resource:

Laing, C. (2006). Teaching Teens How to Be Parents. Retrieved from the parent map website: http://www.parentmap.com/article/teaching-teens-to-be-parents

 

How to Parent a Pregnant Teen

Nearly one million teen girls give birth every year. For some, a pregnancy comes as an unwelcomed surprise. Others may attempt to become pregnant, believing that a baby will love them unconditionally. Whatever the case may be, and regardless of how you may feel as a parent when your teen breaks the news to you, a pregnant teen needs your support and love through her pregnancy.

1. ·  Talk about options. Initially your teen may be experiencing a myriad of emotions: fear, resentment, denial and confusion. Although you will be on an emotional rollercoaster ride as well, you need to place your feelings to the side and concentrate on what is right for your daughter. If she doesn't feel comfortable returning to school, offer to get her a tutor. If she knows she does not want the responsibility of raising a baby, consider adoption. If she chooses to keep the baby, help her to understand the responsibility facing her and the changes it will bring not only to her life, but to the lives your family as well. Laying out her options and helping her decide what is best is the first step in demonstrating your support for her.

·  2  Seek medical care immediately. The younger the teen, the higher the risk for complications during labor. For this reason, early pre-natal care is very important for the health of your daughter and the baby she is carrying. When you take her to the doctor, be sure not to chastise her in front of the doctor or make excuses for your pregnant teen's actions, regardless of any embarrassment you may feel. This will only belittle your daughter, who may be feeling enough shame about her condition.

·  3 Help her change her lifestyle. During her pregnancy, your daughter will need to make certain lifestyle changes to ensure the delivery of a healthy baby. Take walks with her to help her to get the exercise she needs, which may ease the pain of labor. Make sure she eats right. Provide her with plenty of fruits and veggies. Encourage her to drink water, milk and juice. If you know your teen may have been smoking, take her to smoking-cessation classes to assist her in quitting. Through all of these changes, be sure to provide gentle encouragement rather than taking the dictator route. Remember that she will soon be hormonal, and you want to avoid any unnecessary fighting between the two of you.

·  4  Sign up for pre-natal classes. This can be a class focused on pregnant teens a or childbirth class for later in her pregnancy. Do not force her to attend, but explain that these classes will help prepare her for the birth of the baby and for life as a mother once the baby is born.

·  5 Show her love. Most parents are so caught up in their own emotions over their teen's pregnancy, they don't take enough time to think about what their teen is feeling. Your teen may feel as though she has let you down and caused you shame. This is why it's important to talk to your daughter about her, and not about her mistake. You need to let her know that you are still proud of her and love her as much as you did before she became pregnant. This is a time for mothers and daughters to bond. Relay to her how you felt when you became pregnant for the first time. If she feels she can relate to you, she will have an easier time coping with all that lies ahead of her.

If you are having a difficult time accepting your daughter's pregnancy and find it hard to be supportive due to your own emotions, find someone to talk to. Your feelings need to be validated and understood in order to support your daughter. Also, regardless of your teen's age, do not insist that she marry the baby's father. This could be the biggest mistake of her life, as many teens are not truly in love with one another at the time of conception. Marrying for the sake of a baby is never a good reason to marry.

Resource:

 Myers, H. (2013). How to Parent a Pregnant Teen. Retrieved from the ehow website: http://www.ehow.com/how_4706106_parent-pregnant-teen.html

The Effect of Teenage Pregnancy on the Family.

While teenage pregnancy obviously affects the teens, especially the young mother, more than anyone, there are consequences for the entire family. From the moment the pregnancy test reads positive, the effects touch everyone involved.

Loss of Trust- Discovering your teen has been sexually active can be a real blow to your relationship, especially if she had indicated that she wasn't.

Stress - Teenage pregnancy is considered high risk, and worrying about the health of both the young mother and the new baby can cause stress for the whole family.

Changing Relationships- Parents of teenage parents must get used to the idea that their children are now responsible for another person. Boundaries and rules may need to be adjusted to reflect the new relationships as these young parents balance youth and responsibility.

Financial Concerns- Most teens aren't equipped to support themselves, and they are even less able to support an infant. The teens' parents often end up providing at least some financial support for the baby, which can cause hardship, especially in lower-income families.

Positive Effects-  Occasionally, troubled teens decide to turn their lives around when they become parents. Seeing the positive changes in the young mother can reduce stress in the family.The teen years are often turbulent times for kids and parents, and coming together to care for a new baby may show both sides that they can work together.

Resource:

Fox, A (2013). The Effect of Teenage Pregnancy on the Family. Retrieved from the ehow website: http://www.ehow.com/facts_6308598_effect-teenage-pregnancy-family.html

Tips for Parents With Pregnant Teens

 As a parent, one of your worst nightmares is probably the prospect of your teen telling you that she's pregnant, or worse, finding out that your teen daughter is pregnant and she didn't tell you. Before you do anything, take a deep breath and know that you're not alone. Your teen didn't get pregnant because you're a bad parent. She got pregnant by making poor decisions.

 Get Support

If you recently found out that your daughter is pregnant, you might be experiencing emotions ranging from hopelessness to anger to sadness. You'll need support through this time period, so reach out to family members or consider going to individual therapy. Also, your daughter will need support. A good option is to encourage your daughter to go to therapy to discuss her emotions, choices and future, and attend family therapy together. Look into local support groups for pregnant teens, so your daughter can get support from other young women going through the same thing.

Discuss Options

You have three main options to consider, according to the Mayo Clinic. Your teen could keep the baby, look into adoption or end the pregnancy. It's important to have a dialogue around the options, talking about the pros and cons and consider the best option for your daughter and family. Listen to what your daughter feels is the best option, and try to support her even if you don't believe it's the right choice. You should definitely give her guidance, but she may not take the path that you think she should. Consider including the baby's father in these discussions.

Get Medical Treatment

No matter what, you should get your teen medical treatment as soon as possible. Pick up prenatal vitamins and schedule an appointment with a gynecologist or OBGYN. The doctor will be able to discuss your daughter's options further and give your recommendations for adoption agencies, prenatal classes and therapists depending on the choice your daughter makes.

Discuss Lifestyle Changes

Your teen might not know what lifestyle changes she needs to make to have a healthy baby. Teens Health reports that you should talk to her about some of the things she'll need to do such as quitting smoking, drinking and using drugs if applicable; avoiding caffeine; getting plenty of sleep; eating healthfully; and avoiding unsafe sex in which she could contract sexually transmitted diseases.

Prenatal Classes

Depending on your daughter's choice, you should consider enrolling her in prenatal classes. In these classes, she'll learn what to expect during delivery and practical skills such as changing a baby's diaper and feeding a baby.

Prepare for the Baby

You'll have to make a lot of decisions as a family if your teen intends on keeping the baby. For example, you'll have to decide if your teen will return to high school or go to college as well as who'll watch the baby during these times and what role each family member will play in the baby's life.

Resource:

Bolyn, M. (2010.) Tips for Parents With Pregnant Teens Retrieved from the live Strong website: http://www.livestrong.com/article/110429-tips-parents-pregnant-teens/

 

Teen Birth Rates in the United States, 1940 – 2008.

From 1940 to 1957, the teen birth rate increased 78 percent to a record high.

The birth rate dropped fairly steadily from the end of the 1950s through the

mid-1980s, but then increased 24 percent between 1986  and 1991. Between 1991 and 2005, the teen birth rate decreased 34 percent to a record low of 40.5 in 2005. The

teen birth rate increased 5 percent between 2005 and 2007. However, between 2007 and 2008 the teen birth rate decreased 2 percent. The chart and the table in this document reflect births per 1,000 teen girls aged 15-19 in the United States and are the most recent national data available. 

Resources:

The National Campaign. Teen Birth Rates in the United States,

1940 – 2008. Retrieved on Feb. 25, 2013. From the National Campaign website: http://www.thenationalcampaign.org/resources/pdf/TBR_1940-2006.pdf

 

Facts and Statistics on Marriage

  A well known fact is that in previous history, people married very young, simply because we didn’t live that long. During the 1800′s it was not uncommon for people to marry in their mid-teens; in the 1400′s you got married as young as 12 ( A boy was considered a man, a girl was a woman as soon as she had her first menstrual cycle), something that was extremely common but would be viewed as scandalous in America today. (Currently, Muslim girls can marry at age 12.) Over 50 countries allow marriage at 16, including the United States. Some states
require parental permission while others do no

Resources:

Markson, G. (2006) Facts and Statistics on Marriage. Retrieved on Feb. 26, 2013. From the Families.com website: http://www.families.com/blog/facts-and-statistics-on-marriage

The Age Of Unwed Mothers; Is Teen Pregnancy The Problem

teen pregnancy “epidemic.”?????????

The teen birth rate is, and has been for many years, much lower today than it was in the 1950s an

1960s, when many teens married and began their families young.

Since the early 1970s, the proportion of all teenage mothers who conceived their children out of wedlock, but got married before the birth, has dropped from 47 percent to 16 percent.

About ten percent of 15-19 year olds become pregnant each year. More than 40 percent of our teenagers will become pregnant before they reach their 20th birthday

.

About 28 percent of younger teenagers (and 23 percent of 18 and 19 year olds) who are sexually active either do not use any method of contraception or use it only sporadically

Nearly half of first-time adolescent mothers become pregnant again within two years.”

It is certainly true that the proportion of unmarried teenagers who have had sex has risen dramatically. The proportion of 16-year-old girls who had ever had intercourse increased from about 8-9 percent

during the 1960s and early 1970s to about 21 percent during the mid-1980s. In the years 1958 through 1960, only about 27 percent of 18-year-old women had ever had intercourse, and many of them were married. By 1970-72, about 35 percent of 18 year-old women were no longer virgins. But by the mid-1980s, despite a rapid drop in teen marriage rates, the majority of 18-year-old women were sexually experienced urrently, about a quarter of U.S. young women, and about one-fifth of men, remain virgins through their teen years.

YOUNG ADULT women having children is not a new phenomenon. The number of women who had their first child during their teen years was almost the same in the early 1970s as in the early 1990s. But the proportion of teen moms who conceived their first child out of wedlock has increased significantly, rising from about 65 percent in 1970-74 to 89 percent in 1990-94. The single biggest change in recent decades has been the declining proportion of pregnant single teens who marry. Over the past 30 years, two larger social trends have affected teen childbearing. First, higher ages at marriage, combined with earlier initiation into sex, have led to an increasing number of single teens exposed to the risk of premarital pregnancy for longer periods of time. The second trend is the decreased likelihood that a single teenager will either “legitimate” her pregnancy by marrying or giving the baby up for adoption

.

Until the late 1960s, the almost universal response to teen pregnancy in public schools was expulsion. Although expulsion reflected the strong social stigma attached to premarital sexuality and unwed childbearing, the general policy also typically applied to married students as well as to teachers who were pregnant and beginning to “show.” But by the late 1960s and early 1970s, a number of large urban school districts, as well as a handful of states, were overturning this policy, taking concrete steps to keep pregnant students enrolled in school.

Moreover, by 1973, more than 200 local school systems in the United States had created programs to encourage school-age pregnant girls and young mothers to continue their education, obtain prenatal care, and engage in group counseling “to help solve problems that either may have led to or been caused by the pregnancy.” Most of these programs offered young mothers a “regular educational program in a special setting.

Increase the legal authority of adult custodial parents regarding the parenting decisions of younger teens. Currently, we as a society routinely release infants to the care and custody of girls who are too young to drive a car or vote. The girl’s parents, who may disapprove of early or unmarried childbearing, are effectively forced into supporting whatever decision the girl makes, since any alternative would leave legally unprotected both their child and their grandchild. State legislatures should consider requiring a minor, or at least a girl who is under age 16, to obtain the commitment of a parent or other adult to serve as her baby’s legal guardian before the baby is released from the hospital into her custody

Resources:

Gallegher, M. (n.d.) The Age Of Unwed Mothers; Is Teen Pregnancy The Problem? Retrieved on Feb 26, 2013 from the Americal Values. Org website: http://www.americanvalues.org/Teen.PDF 

Facts on American Teens' Sexual and Reproductive Health

•Each year, almost 750,000 U.S. women aged 15–19 become pregnant.[19] Two-thirds of all teen pregnancies occur among 18–19-year-olds.[19]

•Overall, 68 pregnancies occurred per 1,000 women aged 15–19 in 2008. The 2008 rate was a record low and represented a 42% decline from the peak rate of 117 per 1,000, which occurred in 1990.[19]

•The majority of the decline in teen pregnancy rates in the United States (86%) is due to teens’ improved contraceptive use; the rest is due to increased proportions of teens choosing to delay sexual activity.[21]

•Despite having declined, the U.S. teen pregnancy rate continues to be one of the highest in the developed world. It is more than twice as high as rates in Canada (28 per 1,000 women aged 15–19 in 2006) and Sweden (31 per 1,000).[22]

•In 2008, New Mexico had the highest teenage pregnancy rate (93 per 1,000); rates in Mississippi, Texas, Nevada and Arkansas followed. The lowest rates were in New Hampshire (33 per 1,000), Vermont, Minnesota, North Dakota and Massachusetts followed.[20]

•Eighty-two percent of teen pregnancies are unplanned; teens account for about one-fifth of all unintended pregnancies annually.[23]

•Fifty-nine percent of pregnancies among 15–19-year-olds in 2008 ended in birth, and 26% in abortion.[19]

FATHERHOOD

•Most teen males report that they would be very upset (46%) or a little upset (34%) if they got someone pregnant, while the remaining 20% report that they would be pleased or a little pleased.[5]

•Teen fatherhood rates vary considerably by race. In 2006, the rate among black males aged 15–19 who became fathers (34 per 1,000) was more than twice that among whites (15 per 1,000).[29]

•The rate of teen fatherhood declined 25% between 1990 and 2006, from 24 to 18 per 1,000 males aged 15–19. This decline was far more substantial among blacks than among whites (38% vs. 18%).[29]

Resource:

Facts on American Teens' Sexual and Reproductive Health. Retrieved on Feb 26, 2013 from the Guttmacher Institute Website: http://www.guttmacher.org/pubs/FB-ATSRH.html

How to Deal With Teen Pregnancy Realistically

Having been a teenage mother myself, I can completely relate and give advice to those parents who are dealing with their children being pregnant. You might think that it is a difficult part of being a parent, but really it does not have to be.

Instructions:
Step 1
First thing as a parent that you have to realize is that this is not about you. This is about your child having a baby. Nothing else. You either deal with it, or you choose not to, there is no in between at all.

Step 2
Do not over react when your daughter comes to you and tells you that she is pregnant. Yes, it is a huge shock and you want to just let all your frustration out. Don't, it is a bad idea to over react at such an important time.

Step 3
Do not ask stupid questions as to how it happened. Everyone knows how it happened, so leave it at that. Offer your ear and your shoulder instead.

Step 4
Give your daughter the options. Having the baby, giving the baby up for adoption or abortion. Yes, abortion as well. It is after all an option that we as women do have. No matter what your views are on the subject, it is her decision to make and you must as her parents advise her of the options.

Step 5
Remind her over and over that you will be there for her no matter what she chooses. If you cannot give her that option, then you are not a good parent, period. Parenting does not stop just because our children get pregnant at an earlier age then we like.

Step 6
Help her decide where she is going to get medical treatment if she chooses to keep her baby. There are many programs that will help teenage mothers and parents cope with medical bills. WIC and Medicaid is two of them. Check them out as soon as you can.

Step 7
If keeping the baby is her choice, begin to prepare her for what is in store the next up and coming months. Do not sugar coat the details, but do not scare her to make her think she is making the wrong decision. Guide her the way you would want to be guided if this were you.

Step 8

Oh how I love my grandsons !!!If your daughter is happy that she is pregnant, then be happy as well. Yes, it can be a huge financial burden, you will get through it. Take it from a mother who had her 17 and 18 year-old pregnant at the same time. Being a grandparent is amazing! Watching your children, parent their children, is something that words just cannot describe.

Tips & Warnings
1. No matter how much you tell your children about protection, sometimes they just do not listen.
2. Do not make this a burden, it is a joyous part of life.
3. Stay supportive through everything!

Resources:

 Kerns, J. (2013) How to Deal With Teen Pregnancy Realistically. Retrieved on Jan 26, 2013 from the Teen Parent.TV website: http://teenparent.tv/blog/-20000/how-to-deal-with-teen-pregnancy-realistically

Increasing Parent Involvement in Teen Parent Programs

Grandparent involvement Increases teen mother’s well being, Increases academic achievement, Increases financial status, Increases in mother daughter closeness (especially in older teens & those who live apart)

 Resources:

Chilcoat, D. (2010). Increasing Parent Involvement in Teen Parent Programs: The heartwarming and heartbreaking reality of engaging grandparents Retrieved on Feb 26,2013 from the U.S. Department of Health & Human Services website: http://www.hhs.gov/opa/familylife/annualconfabstracts/engaging_grandparents_chilcoat.pdf

The Emotional and Social Effects of Teen Pregnancy

The Harm to the Mother

Many teenage girls are terrified when they find out they are pregnant, unless they happen to have made a pregnancy pact, as did the girls discussed in this CBS News video.
They often don't know who to turn to. Most don't want to admit to their parents that they got pregnant, especially if their parents are particularly strict. And many may be rejected by their boyfriends if they try to talk to them about the pregnancy.
This feeling that there is nowhere to go and no one to turn to is often what causes many young women to run to the nearest abortion clinic as soon as they find out they're expecting. And if the girl doesn't choose to do that, then she is faced with a number of difficult decisions. Will she keep the baby or put it up for adoption? Will she finish school or drop out? If she does decide to keep the baby, how will she support it if she doesn't finish school? But the emotional costs of the pregnancy pale in comparison to what the physical costs could be.
Girls who get pregnant at an especially young age are at a much higher risk or running into complications simply because their bodies are not yet developed enough to support growing another life. Pregnancy is not exactly easy on any woman's body, but it can be especially difficult for a teen's.
And the fact that many teens are embarrassed about their condition or afraid of their parents' reactions may prevent some from seeking good prenatal care. This can lead to health problems for the pregnant mother like high blood pressure and anemia, and these maternal health problems could cause problems for the baby.

The Harm to the Father

Often, the ones who are getting the teenage girls pregnant are teenage boys. These boys seldom consider the consequences of their actions. They just focus on the feel-good aspect of sex. When confronted with the fact that they have created a new life, many will feel overwhelmed and may try to run from the situation. This break in the relationship could be painful for both young parents.
Those who don't run are faced with the very real task of taking care of an unplanned family. The father of a child is responsible for child support in every state in the nation. Because of this increased responsibility, many young men may feel pressured to marry the young pregnant woman, and this could also cause problems for the couple. Pressure and guilt are not good feelings with which to begin any relationship, let alone one that is supposed to last a lifetime. The feeling of being pressured into a marriage could lead to feelings of resentment later for both parties.
At least 60 percent of teen marriages end in divorce within 5 years ("Teenage Couples: Caring, Change, and Commitment", by Jeanne Warren Lindsay). Divorce hurts everyone involved, including the child that was the reason the parents got married in the first place. Children often feel responsible when their parents get divorced, and knowing that their mom and dad only got married because mom was pregnant with him/her may cause those guilt feelings to be even stronger.

The Harm to the Baby

As noted above, teen mothers often do not receive good prenatal care. As a result of this, they may not gain enough weight during their pregnancies. This lack of weight gain can cause the baby to have a low birth weight, which is associated with all sorts of problems, like developmental disorders and even a high rate of infant death.
Babies born to teen mothers are often malnourished and have limited access to decent health care. They rarely receive adequate social or cognitive stimulation. This can negatively impact their intellectual development and can lead to poor school performance later on.
Further, studies have shown that children born to teen mothers experience higher rates of abuse and neglect and often turn to crime as a way of expressing themselves and getting what they want. These children often experience troubled romantic relationships when they are older, and girls born to teen mothers are very likely to become teen mothers themselves, thus repeating the destructive pattern.

The Harm to the Grandparents

Parents who receive the news that their teenage daughter (or son) is going to have a baby may feel a whole range of emotions: shock, denial, rage, and even joy that they are going to be grandparents.
But grandparents of babies born to teen mothers may also have some difficult decisions to make. How willing are they to be involved in raising the baby? Do they want their daughters and sons to continue with their schooling? If this is the case, a lot of the early child care responsibilities may fall to the grandparents.
The grandparents may also feel obligated to provide financial help, and while this might not be a bad short-term plan, the financial involvement needs to be monitored closely. The baby's mother and father may become dependent on this financial support, and it will be harder for them to learn how to support themselves and their new family.
Whatever they do, grandparents need to be supportive of both mom and dad because this is a scary situation for everyone. They also need to remember that it is not the baby's fault that this has happened, so they shouldn't take their anger out on their grandchild.
It may be difficult at times to be the only adult in such an adult situation, so grandparents need to be prepared to guide their children in their premature assumption of adult responsibility in order to keep the whole family together.

Resources:

Workingmomwm  (2012) The Emotional and Social Effects of Teen Pregnancy Retrieved on Feb 26, 2013 from the hub pages website: http://workingmomwm.hubpages.com/hub/TeenPregnancyHurts